Defeat

Help me. I’m so broken and deafeated. Ten miscarriages later. 700$ in negative pregnancy tests. 1000$ in fertility treatments. I already have one little girl but so badly just long for ONE more baby. To feel complete. I’m tired of the false hopes in evap lines. I’m tired of doctors not knowing what’s wrong. Over all I’m just tired of trying to get through my days without wanting to drive my car into river and stop all the pain. I have literally no one to vent to. No one to help me. I don’t want to seem like a bad person for being so angry and broken. It’s too much. How does anyone cope? I haven’t found a way.