Another baby?

Brittney • Sweet boy 10/19/07. Happily married 08/26/17. Another sweet boy 07/18/18!!

Okay, I have 2 boys (one with my current husband and one from my ex husband). My husband seems pretty set on not trying for a girl. But he says “if we won the lottery then yeah.” Or “if we were younger, then yeah”. Sometimes I feel like I’m fine with not trying again and then other times it’s overwhelming that I may never have a daughter (and nothing’s to say I wouldn’t have another boy even if we did try) but I feel like if don’t try, there’s zero chance of having a baby girl, and I just don’t know if I can live the rest of my life thinking “if we had tried one last time, would I have gotten my girl?”. I LOVE my boys, they are my world, and if I had a 3rd boy, I would love him just the same, of course I’d be disappointed at first, but I would have to come to terms at that point that God just saw me fit to be a boy mom. I want to talk to my husband about it (seriously) we’ve jokingly talked about it, but I haven’t really told him 100% how I feel. I’ll be 34 in March, so if we were gonna try, I’d like to start trying by my birthday. I definitely don’t want to get pregnant after 35 and I don’t want to be raising babies the rest of my life. I want to have a life with my husband after our babies are grown. My oldest is 11 and my youngest is obviously a July baby. Ugh! Idk that I’m looking for advice really, just wanted to “say it out loud”. Thanks for reading if you stayed this long!