Don’t even know how to put it into words

I couldn’t ask for much more out of life. I have a wonderful husband, intelligent 6 year old little girl, and a happy healthy 10w old little boy who sleeps 10-11 hrs per night! I have a beautiful home, great friends, great part time job that allows me to make some money and still be an almost full time mommy!

Yet I’m so down.....it’s irrational and totally chemical.

My weight gain is bothering me. I’m always tired. My back and neck and feet hurt. Every time they bother me it reminds me of how different my body is now. I got on the trampoline to jump with my 6 year old and immediately urinated on myself. Way to go pelvic floor! I find myself comfort eating and drinking sodas and alcohol. Exercise helps when I feel down, but sometimes I get so down that I don’t have the motivation to get up and do the exercise to feel better! And it kinda bugs me that I have to put in so much physical effort to maintain a decent attitude! It just seems that everything is more difficult now. I know this will pass, but it’s tough while I’m going through it.

Considering seeing a counselor and asking my midwife for a prescription for Welbutrin. I took that after my first baby. First I’ll try out this new work out regimen next week and see how I feel. Meds will be my last resort.

I just feel like I have potential to help myself but sometimes these blues get me so far down that it’s hard to get done what I know I need to for myself.

Thanks for reading.