Me too

It’s hard to keep silent and honestly, my story isn’t as black and white as some others I’ve heard. My first time was rape. I didn’t understand it at the time. I was too young and naive to understand it for what it was. I had been texting a guy in my class and I really wanted to date him. He was younger than me by a year. He convinced me to pick him up before school one day.

Once I got to his house, he greeted me at the door and things got pretty hot. A make out session was soon followed, way too quickly, by him attempting to pull down my pants. I remember saying no several times. Before I knew it, he was inside and it was all over. At that point I convinced myself that it was fine and this is how some relationships start. We “dated” for a couple months and it was mostly about sex. I don’t even remember us going on a date. But, I was his girlfriend and he was my boyfriend. I didn’t like the sex. I remember a couple of times where I tried to push him off of me because I didn’t want to do it anymore.

I thought having sex meant I was more mature than some other girls in my grade. I never experienced an O with him. I knew it wasn’t going anywhere so I told him I didn’t want to have sex anymore until I got on the pill. I didn’t tell him when I got on the pill and broke up with him soon after.

I guess I’m telling my story so that young girls can read it and understand that no, that isn’t how relationships are supposed to start. It should be completely consensual. If you are in a similar situation, get yourself out. Trust your gut and follow your heart. If it doesn’t feel right, it’s not.