I really need help

I’m a first time mum & I have anxiety & depression , I’m finding it very difficult at times on what I’m meant to be doing my baby will be 1 soon & I have no support by my family there all very judgmental & make me feel like a bad mum when I ask for any advice I don’t have a set day/night routine for my baby what should I be doing & can anyone help me get in a good routine ? Sorry if this doesn’t make any sense 😔