Dug myself into a hole

I’m a very introverted person. I have a friend group, but I’m still shy to opening up and being around them without my boyfriend. Tomorrow, friend 1 asked who’s free. Me and friend 2 said we were, and plans to take a trip to Seattle tomorrow we’re made. I told myself I wouldn’t cancel, because I need to push myself out of my limits with my friends. Friend 2 hasn’t responded if he’s going anymore because he said he didn’t want to go to a certain place, and now I’m kind of stuck wondering what to do. It’s not like I hate friend 1, but I haven’t hung out with a guy who’s not my boyfriend in literal years. I also hate the fact that I’d be going to Seattle with him alone. My boyfriend doesn’t care, and he’s busy tomorrow catching up with a childhood friend, but I can already feel how awkward it’s going to be for me. To cancel or not to cancel? I’m pretty sure I’ll end up going, but I have no idea on what we’re going to talk about. We’re 2 completely different people. Friend 2 gets along with friend 1 more than anyone in the group. Plus, I’m pretty sure friend 1 had a crush on me at some point, and pretty sure now that he’s newly single, he’s going to catch feelings for me again. It’s because I care and listen to anyone who I hang out with. They always seem to develop feelings for me. Oh boy 🙄