Does anyone else literally fight an orgasm?

I feel like I’ve never actually had a proper one because I fight it so much, no matter what I do I can’t stay still, I wiggle around and push my boyfriends hands away without even realising it! When I’m alone I do it as well, I start closing my legs and my whole body just fights it 😂 it feels good so it’s not like I’m fighting it because it’s uncomfortable but just on the build up I just go mental, any tips with how to stop doing it?

He’s tried holding me down (consensually) and I still just thrash around and he loses the spot and it’s over 😩