A few years ago my husband and I fell pregnant.

I already have a son who is 12 years old (from a previous relationship) I fell when I was very young, he wasn’t planned but I knew what I had to do and he made my life change for the best. He’s my everything

When I fell pregnant a few years ago I was on the pill, it was a complete surprise, obviously we hadn’t been trying and was just a total shock.

We weren’t in a very good place at all. We’d hit a bit of a rough patch and I was also being made redundant. So to then find out I was pregnant we were at a loss as what to do.

We decided to terminate the pregnancy. It wasn’t a decision made lightly. There was a lot of tears from both of us and a hell of a lot of stress but we felt at that time it was the right thing to do.

We weren’t financially stable and our relationship wasn’t either so we felt it was best

Fast forward 3 years we are in a completely different place and have been trying to conceive

I thought it would be easy as I’d previously fell twice before without trying.

It’s been 8 months and nothing.

I feel like I’m being punished for what we done a few years ago.

I thought maybe if I put this out on here it might give me some peace that Iv spoke about it as no one knows what we done apart from us as we are too ashamed to admit it.

Please don’t be nasty and knock me when I’m down. I always never believed in terminations but I now understand everyone has their reasons