Postpartum

I wanted the baby I have so bad and i got her. She’s almost 7 months old and I just started working as a nurse so even though I work about 3 days a week and they are long shifts I still feel like the rest of the week i don’t get to spend enough time with her! My parents watched her before they went back to work and now his mom started watching her for the 3 days 2 hours away from us and it’s so hard! I don’t want to have to put her in daycare and I feel so horrible leaving her because every time I get her back it’s like she fussed and cried all day that I have her and I get upset with her but I feel so hopeless on what to do when I do everything to try to fix it. When I call her on my lunch break his mom makes me feel like I shouldn’t even call because I’ll get her upset. Sometimes I just feel like she would be better off without me. Her dad and her both would. I am not trying to make anyone feel bad for me whatsoever I just had to rant my feelings. I just want to cry and cry and never stop honestly.