Im ready to give up

I’m ready to just quit trying. This is only my second month BUT I just thought I would get pregnant soon as we started trying Boy was I wrong. So the first month I was like.... ok don’t stress so We tried again this month I’m 8dpo and I broke down and tested with the dye strip pregnancy test and it’s a negative. It just makes me feel broken.. so many people I know are “accidentally” getting pregnant and freaking out because they didn’t want a baby but you got people out here that want one so bad and do everything possible to get pregnant and A BFN.

I know it’s only my second month and i shouldn’t even make a big deal out of it but it’s so hard when your doing everything right and still getting negatives. I have been taking prenatal vitamins for two months now haven’t drank a drop of alcohol even when we go out and everyone else is. We even used preseed that so many people swear by & still got a bfn. It’s starting to cause stress on our relationship because now our sex life is wack, because we have been trying so the past two months when I’m ovulating we have sex everyday for like two weeks just so we won’t miss any days. So now after those two weeks we don’t even touch each other at all it’s like since we’re forcing our self to those two weeks we don’t Even want to think about sex the rest of the month..

This month I just told my self don’t even stress and a part of me was like no there’s no way but then another part of me googles any little thing I feel like the other night I had a tiny twinge it was 6dpo in my lower left stomach area and of course googled it also had a lot of milky white discharge googled that too and weird but my nose got really stopped up when I laid down that night but I was fine the next day it’s not like a cold or anything so of course GOOGLED it and they all said could possibly be a sign of pregnancy so again one part of me was like... nah your not pregnant but another part of me was like yes maybe so! So lastnight when I went to take a shower and took my bra off my boobs felt SO heavy like not normal and there sore if you touch them not like crazy sore but just heavier hard to explain. So it got my excited so this morning I took a test it says no I woke up at like 530 so that was my first morning urine and I didn’t take one I went back to sleep and when I woke up at like 9 I was like heck I’ll just take one to see and there’s no second line what so ever so of course now I’m in the dumps and I feel so broken and depressed I swear everytime I get on fb or social media someone I know is announcing their pregnant and it honestly makes me so jealous!!! I hate to be that way but it does j just want to be pregnant so bad. I know everyone says when you stop trying is when you will get pregnant and I say I’m gonna stop trying but I know next month I’m gonna want to try again... this just sucks why can’t we all just get pregnant when we want to