TTC and Holidays

Y’all, holidays are hard without a baby. We started trying on Halloween last year, and the Halloween decorations rolling out everywhere remind me *hard core* that I’m not pregnant yet. My husband and I are both crazy about holidays - family traditions, huge parties, excessive decorations, the works. Every. damn. time. another holiday rolls around, I dream of gifting my husband a positive pregnancy test, but every. damn. time, I can’t. Each holiday that comes and goes breaks my little heart, for me and especially for my husband because I know he feels the same way.

I don’t want to complain without making it clear that I fully understand trying for almost a year isn’t nearly as long as some of you have been struggling, and I acknowledge that I’m nowhere NEAR your level. I don’t even want to imagine what it’s like to try for years, and I truly applaud your strength. The last thing I want to do is minimize the feelings of anyone, whether they’ve been trying for weeks or for decades. That being said, I don’t think there are ANY parts of TTC that are easy, no matter how long you’ve been trying. I want to acknowledge the small stuff, the things that people who haven’t struggled with infertility don’t think about, the things we all understand but can’t put into words. An internet nod to all the things we silently hate a little bit, because it reminds us of what we don’t have. To all my peeps out there that are struggling with the daily stuff OR the big stuff - I feel you, you’re not crazy, and you’re not alone. 😘 This was mostly a vent, but if anyone out there feels the same, you’re in my heart today. 💕💕