Tea and bf issues

Im in An LDR with a guy ive known for years(over 10!)

and we were together before i moved for school. And We're having issues that are more frequent now that we're long distance.

Here's the tea Sis

my boyfriend has ADHD and he doesn't always communicate things between his family to me, things that I should know, such as basic plans.

I believe he doesn't have the discipline sometimes and other times I believe its the ADHD.

But they don't communicate too well, and sometimes I'm left looking like an asshole!

For example, today we had plans to spend the day together. He didn't tell me his family had plans to spend time together with his brother visiting while on vacation from the Airforce!

So we just went along with our plans. Then later his family was giving me the cold shoulder. I had no idea what was going on.

I had asked them 2 weeks ago about plans before we set to visit and they never said anything about plans Even though they had every Chance to communicate with me and didn't, so in the end, I END up looking like an asshole.

Yet he overly shares my personal business with his mother.

I don't know how to deal with this. I know I need to sit him down and seriously talk about it face to face.

I spoke to his sister. She seemed calm but I know she was talking shit and was pissed off prior to her knowing that I had no idea, (as would I!) But im just so frustrated and sad.

I'm not a selfish person. I hate possessive spouses ppl. Etc.

So what can I do ?