Mixed feelings second time around

We did our first frozen transfer in April and we lost the baby at 9weeks due to a hemorrhage. Today I had my medical instructions for my egg retrieval in October. I am excited to start again but this time its different. Like that sad feeling in the back of my head. We did take some time off but I do not think this feeling will ever go away.

Heres some background history- my husband has a sperm count in the thousands with low motlity so we have to do ICSI and the PGS testing. The doctor said this would be the last time he would use my husbands sperm 😰.

How does everyone try to cope with this?