Needing advice urgently
I don’t know where else I can ask for advice regarding this issue.
My partner and I have been together for 3 years and recently just had a baby.
Before this relationship I was sexually assaulted 10 times by 3 different guys.
The first was my boyfriend at the time I was 15 he forcefully done sexual stuff I didn’t want (not sex) then threatened to rape me. I kept giving him chances thinking he was going to change. I blame myself everyday for putting myself in that situation. I did try pulling away and saying no but he over powered me and coming from an abusive childhood I was scared stiff.
The second guy was a friend he tried to have sex with me but I stopped it he landed up telling my group of mates that i slept with him now they laugh and call me a slut everyday.
The third was my best mate I have known for 18 years I woke up with him trying to undo my belt to my jeans while on top of me. I landed up running away.
I try to explain all these to my partner but he says in a way it is my fault, and is always asking am I sure I haven’t done nothing else sexual ways that I have not told him. It is starting to cause a lot of strain on my emotional factor and on my relationship. How am I able to reassure him? We have talked about breaking up if it doesn’t work but he threatened to keep my daughter or get lawyers into me if I leave even though I already agreed it would be 50/50. I’m so scared of what to do I want him to be able to believe me 😣 any advice would be greatly appreciated
P.S I was 15,16,17 when this all happened and have been through counselling due to suicidal thoughts I’m 20 now
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