Why am I not good enough?

(this is gonna be long..)

I’m never enough. I always make a mistake somehow. It’s always my fault. No matter what i do it’s somehow my fault. Even if i don’t do anything wrong; it’s always me.

But it doesn’t matter bc i’m just “dramatic” i’m “on my period” and just “being a girl” so it doesn’t matter. but this never changes this is how i feel. people tell me i’m sensitive but i’m really not. this stuff doesn’t normally get to me but i’m just sick of it.

I just want to be enough. Im NEVER enough. even if i change for someone it’s not good enough. i’m constantly getting yelled at. then whenever i poor my feelings out i get yelled at for it. bc i’m too dramatic and making a scene. i just want to be good enough but nobody sees me that way. i wish i could just be myself and be good enough. i never meet any expectation and even when i do it not good enough! i’m just not good enough. I try to be positive and i try to stay calm and stuff. but i can’t! i try to keep my head up but i just feel like everyone is weighing me down. everything’s always my fault and that’s how it’s always been.

And people are probably gonna say something that “it’ll get better”. It never had and it never will.

Why am i not good enough?