Average day of bfp

So what TRULY is the average day someone gets even a faint bfp?

I believe Ive mostly read that 13dpo is the average day of a bfp but is that based off people who only take a test on the day af is due or is that from people who actually test early and don’t get even a faint line until that date?

Because it’s disheartening to see people say they used a FRER at 12DPO and got a bfn and everyone always says “You’re not out!” When we all know that maybe 5% of people actually go on to get a bfp if they don’t already have one by 12 dpo.

It just feels like false hope. Everyone just out here lying.