Help depressed pregnant and suicidal

So I’m 32 weeks pregnant and I just can’t do it anymore I’m physically mentally and emotionally exhausted. I’m scheduled a c section at 37 weeks but I honestly cannot wait that long. I’ve had a prem baby at 32 weeks before who was in NICU so I know what it’s like. But I just want this baby out now I’m afraid I’m gonna do something stupid to try get this baby out. I can’t cope anymore. I’m in constant pain. I can’t eat or sleep. On top of that I have 2 toddlers and my husband is a POS. I know I sound selfish but I’d rather get this baby out than kill my self cause honestly I feel so suicidal and depressed. What do I do. Can I beg for this baby to be taken out? I just can’t do it