I have had enough .....

I was with my ex for over a year... He moved into my apartment technically I feel like he used me and because he wasn’t happy at the end he made sure I wasn’t happy either.

When we first met I had to be honest with him and told him I slept with someone when he went MIA for almost over two months. Reason why he stopped talking to me it’s because he went trough my phone and saw all DMs from guys I wanted to meet before him... BTW I never did anything with this guys ones I started talking to him.

I gave him the option to leave or stay and he decided to stayed to make my life a living hell I won’t play victim but he’s a narcissist and I didnt realized until I was really deep in the relationship.

I was verbally abused and giving the silent treatment whenever he felt like it.

He decided to broke up with me last Xmas and moved out of my aunts house for new year yes we were living with her cause we were trying to saven $$ for a house. Reason why it’s again because I didn’t let him control me anymore he was trying for me to block and delete all of my closed friends from my social media’s just because he didn’t like any of them.

Therefore I told him no that he wasn’t my dad and I wasn’t doing anything wrong and I wasn’t !!

I was loyal to him since the day he decided to stay with me and moved to my place.

He broke up with me... Started talking again in March, we were together for almost 3 months after, then he went MIA. Started talking again in Sep and we talked for like 3 weeks then again the goes MIA. He hit me up again in Oct we have been talking since then but yesterday was the day I said enough!!!!

I’m sick of his mind games, of me always walking on egg shells, trying to prove him something, him playing victim and turning the table, him walking in and out of my life like nothing, untangling knots and getting hurt over and over.

I’m a codependent 😔 I always think him treating me like this it’s love when isn’t !!! I’m scared to be alone and single. There’s some days when I’m so brave and I’m moving on with my life but there’s other days were I wish we still together.

He broke me, I’m damaged, numb and I still love him I know I won’t ever be the same but I’m

having a difficult time at letting him go.

I posted those pics because we always have the same convo over and over and I always give him a chance whenever he hits me up.

I know I fucked up at the beginning but he deff made sure I was left in a whole when he moved out.

Any advices would help cause I not longer know what to do I feel trapped 😕💜

I need some strength and powerful advices specially if you have ever over come a relationship with a narcissist.