CONFUSED AND WORRIED...Help!

This is long and can be boring but I can seriously use all the advice I can get right now!!!

In 2017, i fall in love for the first time of my life. So I fell for everything. I was blindly in love with this cute guy who I used to call my angle ( bc I was an immigrant who didn’t know anyone in Us when I met him)...He was nice at first like any other guy would be and after couple of months he started to mentally abuse me. He became too busy even to see me once in every other week. He said he is always busy.

Like I said at the time I didn’t have friends or family to go to so he was my world and a reason for my smile. So I gave him everything he asked!i was a virgin when I met him. Well I gave him my virginity and ended up being pregnant with this guy. Believe me I was shocked and cried when the doctor told me I was pregnant. Also the doc told me that I have STD!!! 😭😭

I try calling him and texting him that I want to talk to him, no reply. So I just texted him that I was pregnant. Do you know what he said? He said....Well you know what to do, abortion 😔

I’m a religious person who don’t believe in abortion but I know for sure I wasn’t gonna be able to raise this child. So I went through abortion. But he was still too busy to be beside me through the process. I was depressed for couple of weeks since I don’t have family or friends to talk to.

Long story short, I broke up with him and he ended up getting married after couple of weeks.

Do you know how that felt? It felt like hell! I felt the world collapsing on me! Why? Why tho? I’m glad I moved on now but I have a trust issue now I CANT TRUST NO BODY AND IT HURTS!

March 2019, this is when I met the new guy ☺️

I’ve been with this amazing man for 7 months now! He is treating like any lady wanted to be treated. Within this months I already met his family and couple of his friends 🥰

I’ve big trust issue and that caused him a lot but he is still fighting to make sure I can trust him! He fights his butt of for this relationship but I treat him like he is the enemy sometimes and I don’t like that.

LETS GETTING TO THE TOPIC....

I’m 21 years old...I believe I’m JUST starting to build a foundation for a better future. I moved from MD to VA so that I’ll be able to live with my uncle (who recently came in US) so that he will help me financially and I’ll start going back to school since I don’t have any family in this country. All my family and most my friends are back in my country.

The problem now is I just found out that I’m pregnant with this guy! I know I know I know I should’ve been more careful since it already happened to me before but we all are human We all make mistakes!

I told him already and he is so supportive on whatever I want to do. He said he will be here with me no matter what! He felt like I’m distancing my from him after know that I’m pregnant. He said “we’re in this together and we’ll gonna figure it out together”

Little about him, he is 22, lives in MD. Full time student and worker!! Most his family lives back where he is from like mine.

Right now I know I’m pregnant I don’t know what to do. I need some advice pleaseeeeee!!

Abortion? My last abortion still hunts me! Having the child? Me and My bf are just still working on bettering our future by going to school and working! So Abortion? What if I won’t be able to have a baby when I want to Bc I keep getting abortion? Is God gonna forgive me for another abortion, for keep killing the gifts He is giving me! Another sin??!! MY HEAD IS ABOUT TO EXPLODE WITH THIS QUESTIONS

HELP

HELP

HELP