How to talk to family about crossing boundaries with raising your kids..

So my kids are 2 and 3 , boy and girl. Well my mother in laws new husband is always voicing his opinion about hating gay people and using the term faggot etc. So i try to limit being around them because of this.

He is always exclaiming boys need to be treated as boys and they cant wear girly clothes , play with girl toys etc because he will turn out gay.

I absolutely do not agree with this. I allow my son to play with his sister and her toys.

My mil never really voiced an opinion on the matter , but now she acts out according to how he feels. So one day my son was at great grandmas and she only had a pink bib for him to use. Well she took it off him and he was under 1 year old. I thought this was ridiculous. Whenever she sees hom playing with a "girl toy" she points it out saying why are you playing with that , you ccant play with that. Well today my son had a pink dog stuffed animal that makes animal noises from valentine's day. She snatched it out of his hands and said why do you have this and i looked at her and my son looked at her. And at that point i think she realized she crossed the line and gave it back saying "ok your sick ill give it back " but with Christmas around the corner, im concerned they will continue this behavior that i do not wish to raise my kids in this manner. I dont know how to bring up the topic and how to set the boundaries. If anyone can give me advice. Because next time i feel like i may snap out. Thanks