When will we get more us time?

Question

I am asking out of pure honesty because I am afraid. We just had our baby girl 3 weeks ago and I feel like our lives literally just revolve around her and getting sleep. We have no energy for eachother or alone time. I am scared that having a baby will ruin our relationship that we will never cuddle eachother or hold eachother again. We got 5 min the other day while the baby took a quick shut eye and we literally just held eachother. We never thought we could miss eachother even though we are around eachother all the time. How do you manage ? Any tips? Maybe when we get cleared to have sex maybe that will help ... if we ever get time to. This makes me never want to have anymore kids because my husband is literally my everything my best friend my world and I feel like I lost a part of it. But maybe it will get better when we get a better routine

Answer

For us, it was small things that helped us still feel close. I asked my SO if he could go to bed at the same time as me, even if he wasn’t tired, I just wanted to lay next to him until I fell asleep. He’d usually put on a movie and sometimes get back up after I fell asleep to go play a video game until he was actually ready for bed. We also did board game nights until we got comfortable leaving our daughter to do out of the house date nights which was around 6 months. We would have a weekly dinner date night where we were usually only gone 1-2hrs tops. It definitely gets easier as baby gets bigger.

Answer

When the baby sleeps longer, and you’re more comfortable having other people babysit, etc. we will drop my son off with my mom and go out to eat, or even just go shopping somewhere, and that’s enough for us. My son also takes a good 2 hour nap everyday, me and my SO will often just lay in bed cuddling that whole time. And there will be times where even when your baby’s with you it will feel like some alone time with your SO.

Answer

For us, with our first, around 2 months our daughter allowed us more us time. By then she was only waking twice a night and going back to sleep easily after feeding, so we were feeling more well rested and normal. Then we were able to focus on us. 
I will say, if you have family close by, even now, set aside time for a date. Even if it’s just an hour to grab a drink and appetizer, or even simpler, to run to the store together without the baby... just time to reconnect and laugh and be a couple instead of parents. It helps a lot. 
In summary, you’ll get there. You will find your way and your way back to each other if you make it a priority. Know that this is just a stage... your baby will sleep better and you will be able to come up for air in a few weeks or months, as you and the baby get more acclimated to each other.

Answer

My baby just turned 16 weeks and in the beginning I thought the same we went from cuddling every night and having designated show time together, to him going to sleep for work the next day and me being up constantly with the baby on top of being tired I felt so distant from him. But I really does get better. We don’t get to cuddle or watch our show every night but it’s a few nights a week which is way better than never . Your baby will start to sleep more and need to eat less during the night . The first few times the baby sleeps longer take advantage and catch up on sleep then get in some cuddling .

Answer

We struggled with this. I’d say probably around 6m is when we got into more of a routine and schedule. Leaving time for us. 
We spent time together before then but it was still very much around the baby.

Answer

If you have someone that can babysit for just a couple hours - it makes me feel worlds better to go out and have a drink just me and my husband like we used to.

Answer

I found it got a little easier to have adult time around 5 months when she slept better and was in a routine, having sex again definitely helps with feeling close to, it can be so hard but don’t loose each other, this time will pass and things get easier ❤️

Answer

Not for many years. We have three 6 years and under and a full time nanny but alone time is hard to come by. We usually have date nights once a month. With one child it’s the easiest but you’re still healing and trying to figure out your new life.

When will we get more us time?

Let’s Glow

Glow is here for you on your path to pregnancy

25+ million

4.8 stars

20+

Getting Pregnant

Pregnancy

1st Year (Baby & You)

Baby Products