Anxiety over baby's sleep

I'm at a loss about baby's sleep and its really cranking up my anxiety.

He takes three naps a day about 2 - 2.5 hours apart but ONLY sleeps in my arms or in the car. I have tried putting him down sleepy but awake and he just cries or starts to play. I have tried rocking him to sleep and putting him down but he wakes up instantly. I've become obsessed with his schedule and start to feel anxious if he's been awake too long because I know a melt down is on the way.

At night, it's really difficult to get him to sleep in his crib. He wakes often and every time is more difficult. I've been resorting to co-sleeping out of desperation. I want to try the Ferber method but really can't handle the crying; I get very anxious and start to physically feel ill.

Help!!