Sleep trained last night

So I have the neediest, clingiest baby who still wakes up 2-4 times a night for a bottle while bedsharing with me & hubby. I’ve tried sleep training but gave up each time Bc she would cry inconsolably to the point of throwing up.

Well, last night WE DID IT!! At 10.5 months old. We went through the regular bedtime routine of having a bottle, reading Good Night Moon, and turning on the white noise machine. I put her down in a crib in a separate room. She screamed. I tried the Ferber method going in at 3 min, then 5, then every 10 minutes. She screamed out crying at the top of her lungs, and so I would pick her up for just a minute to try to console her before putting her down and leaving again, even if she was still screaming. Each time I picked her up she was shaking and holding onto me for dear life. I felt TERRIBLE. So I decided to try and let her cry it out without my check-ins. Watching her through the monitor, I could see her standing up and moving all around her crib, screaming and crying. 12 minutes later, she gave up, sat down, then went to sleep 😱 I could not believe it!! And she cried for a total of only 30 minutes. Why didn’t I try this sooner?!!!

I spent all night waiting for her to scream again but she did not. She woke up whining a few times but went back to sleep on her own. At one point she even sat up and looked around, but once she realized I wasn’t there, she self-soothed! I was soooo proud of my baby girl. She ended up sleeping 9.5 hours through the night with NO BOTTLE! I’m still in shock. That is the longest nights sleep she’s ever had! I knew she didn’t need a bottle at night and this proved that!

Well, I went in at 7am and decided to wake her up Bc I didn’t want her to wake up scared and alone (she usually wakes around this time). I walked in and just talked to her and praised her for doing so well. She wanted to be held so I picked her up. That’s when I noticed she was burning up 😨

Checked her temp. 101.4. I felt so so awful that she had a fever and had to spend the night alone. Her temp later raised to 102.3 so she’s been on Tylenol all day. Super clingy and fussy. What terrible timing! So now she’s back in our bed Bc I don’t have the heart to make her sleep alone during her time of need.

I was so excited about continuing the sleep training and seeing her cry less and less each day, giving us all a better nights sleep. But now I guess it has to wait. I just hope she continues to do this well the next time that we try. It was such a breakthrough moment and now I feel like we are going backwards 😩 Also feeling like I “tortured” her for no reason, and I’m sad I’m gonna have to start all over again and put her through this again 😭 my heart hurts.

Rant over. Thanks for reading 😅