Postpartum depression

Anybody else struggling?

Like I'm REALLY happy! So grateful for my beautiful baby girl! I love her so much and I'm the happiest I've ever been in my entire life.

Yet, I find myself sobbing because I feel like she was safer in my belly and when other people ask to come see her or hold her, I freak out. I have actual panic attacks when I think about possibly returning to work, or just the idea of leaving her with someone else. I feel so guilty feeling like this because I'm so happy about having my baby. We tried forever and waited so long for her.

My poor dogs, I cant even handle them being in the same room with me and the baby without my husband there. I cry probably 10 times a day and I dont sleep hardly at all at night. And when I do fall asleep and wake back up it's always in a panic because I fell asleep and need to check on her.

I beg my husband to take shifts sleeping so one of us can always be watching her. But he is unreliable when it comes to staying awake. (He works hard and long hours) but that just adds stress to him.

He is the one that brought up the likely depression because he was concerned with how I'm not sleeping and the multiple panic attacks he has witnessed. Hes so sweet and always by my side, even when I wake him up at 3am to cry.

How did you approach the topic with your doctor? Did you talk to your OBGYN or should I talk to my family doctor? I promised my husband I'd take care of myself to better take care of our daughter, I just dont know where to start.