I feel not good enough

Every guy I’ve dated has told me that I was not affectionate with them, they always made first moves and everything. I have a hard time doing that it makes me very anxious. I want to do it.. I want to make first moves. I want to be affectionate to people I’m in a relationship with.

I’m in a newish relationship and it’s already been a topic of discussion. He said I’m weird but in a good way and that he’s used to it, that I’m reserved etc. all having to do with making first moves and being affectionate. It kind of hurt my feelings.

How can I be affectionate and make first moves without getting really anxious about it and afraid of rejection?

:(