Deciding not to have another child.

I haven't been on this app in a long time. Atleast a year. But I came back for this specific question. I had a miscarriage at 18 weeks I gave birth to a little boy back in 2013. 2016 I had a daughter who is now 3 and I love her. In a perfect world I'd try for a boy, just a second child in general but I'd try to have a boy.... but not sure my relationship will allow for it..... how did you make the decision to not have a 2nd child and feel that it was right? I have 2 little stuffed animals I bought a couple years back when I thought I might have a boy some day. I was going to post them online to sell since they've just been sitting with the tags still on never been touched. But I want to cry, I dont want to sell them because that means I'm giving up and I'll never have another child specifically a boy (I have an attachment to a boy since I lost one) the main reason why I cant is because my bf constantly works and hardly has time to help me with my daughter. How could I have another child now if I have trouble getting help with the one child I have? Also relating to that I dont get enough time to myself I dont have a life. I have one friend I see every few months or so and that's it. I wanted to work and have a social life again. Plus I'm not the healthiest right now and I'm trying to change that.

But in my mind I think' "should I give up not having the family I would like to have because my bf doesnt help enough?" Maybe we wouldn't even be together in another year or 2 who knows..... I'm only 26..

So my question is how did you know it was the right decision to not have another child? I think I'm having so much trouble because I lost my son and now it's like I'd never meet him