When to have the talk...

Question

What should I do? I have an 11 yr old daughter and she is just the sweetest child! I'm literally not just saying this because she's mine but I hear it all the time from others. She is also very naive I feel for modern times :/ She still believes in Santa and The Easter Bunny, I catch her still giggling and watching Wonder Pets and Paw Patrol and she has a very vivid imagination with all of her baby dolls and barbies. On the other hand she does all age appropriate things her friends do, she is very popular among her peers.  She makes silly TikTok videos, watches Liv and Maddies and enjoys the roller rink. I feel she acts her age but then she still does things you would expect from a child way younger. Ok, so here is my question lol..When should we have " the talk"? Weve had the very basic talk about body parts, consent and because of technology weve bad the talk about porn and what's inappropriate to watch. Should I have the masturbation talk with her? I feel hormonally shes probably having urges but her mind set isnt their yet and  she would be completed weirded out. I'm also worried that maybe se isnt their yet hormonally and I don't want too put those thoughts in her head😕This parenting stuff is not easy lol. What would yall do?
EDIT: Weve had the sex talk....

Answer

Basic talk about body parts? Basic? 
You don’t need to talk to her about masturbation. She will figure that out on her own. But she by now, should know about sex imo, I had sex Ed younger than 11 years old.

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Why does she need a masturbation talk? That’s more of a personal discovery thing and if she comes to you with questions then talk.

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We learned about masturbation in health class, I never talked about that with my mother. We had the sex talk, but I’ve never heard anything about a Masturbation talk, it sounds unnecessarily awkward.

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If you’ve already talked to her about sex, I don’t really understand what you’re asking. If you want to talk to her about masturbation then go ahead. You won’t make her start doing it if she doesn’t already want to. She sounds like a normal 11 year old.

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Have the sex talk now , along with Santa etc

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You may get better feedback from a parenting group as opposed to controversy corner. But, having the sex talk at a younger age is necessary now unfortunately. I am a child/family therapist and have many Middle School patients that have sent/received nudes, watched porn, and began to engage in sexual activities. You don’t have to go into a super detailed conversation about it all but she needs to now a tad more than basics. Consent is important to discuss and reminding her she can ALWAYS come to you with questions and clarification. (Some teens think you can’t get pregnant if you pee after sex or if you are on top! Crazy rumors like that). Have an open and honest discussion with her and be prepared for any awkward questions.

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Have you talked about her period yet? Cause thats probably coming soon, and with that being said you talk to her about becoming a young lady and sex...

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I hear ya. My daughter is similar to your own. 
I think maybe closer to 13 for the masturbation talk. 11 seems a bit young still to me. Especially for a girl.

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Ohhhh,I can so relate too this topic😑 I would personally wait maybe another year based on your daughter's own personal growth. Everyone is different and Because she still acts a little young I would say she isnt ready just yet. Also I feel it's really important that kids hear this info from parents and not at school.

Answer

😂 my “talk” went like this. “ girl you can’t do that around other people. In your room alone, fine and wash your hands after, but not around people.. that is private and to be kept private” and has to do with my kids ability to self explore because she does. If your daughter hasn’t, then it’s probably not necessary  to talk to her about. I’m not sure what you would say anyway?? If you have talked to her about sex, changes to her body, and are able to have open communication about those changes, you good!! 
My 9 year old started developing before my 10 year old. You could almost see how those physical developments also came with mental development, and sexual awareness. It’s not about age, it’s about when their bodies start changing. But I walk through those changes with them were they are, not before they are.

When to have the talk...

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