My mom’s always asking me for money...

My mom is 45 years old. She works at a bank making very decent money, she receives social security for my 17 year old brother (our dad died), she has a live-in boyfriend who has a job and my 17 year old brother also has a job.

My fiancé and I live off of my one income plus his disability because he was in a motorcycle accident and has life long injuries. We have a 3 year old and a baby on the way.

My problem is my mom asks me for money sooo much. She always “needs groceries” or “barely” has any money to make it to payday. Or once her car was even about to get “repossessed.” But then she posts on Facebook all the time about going to the bar or going to key west (she lives in FL). She has posted pictures of her kitchen counter FULL of liquor. I mean bottles on top of bottles. She is always going out and having fun.

What’s really bothered me is she asked me for $50 the other day for groceries. I always feel horrible if I say no so I sent it to her. (I live in Michigan) well the past two days I have woke up to messages asking if I received my taxes yet. I just filed this weekend so I keep telling her no. I finally asked if she’s got hers. She said no and that all her taxes were taken to pay off something she owed two years ago. So I instantly realized she’s trying to find a way to ask me for some of my tax money.

Let me mention as well that Me and my son have tried to video chat with her 3 different times in the last month. She has not once tried to video chat us back. The last time I tried she said “do you really want him to start bouncing off the walls?” Because my son was just chillin watching tv and she knew he would get excited if she called. So I said “no I guess not”. Now all of a sudden she wants to video chat today and earlier said “I know several people who have gotten their taxes back already, you should check.” I feel like I’m being stalked by my mother for my money.

I want to ask her what she is doing with her household’s 3 incomes plus the social security. But my mom is the type of person who gets an attitude and goes off if you try to speak up. She has a way of making people feel guilty. She plays the innocent victim and acts like everyone is horrible to her. I literally have no idea how to tell this woman no without feeling like the bad person. Am I in the wrong for not wanting to help her out?? I understand I’m getting good amount of money from my taxes but does that obligate me to help her just because she’s my mother? I feel ten times more responsible than her and it’s sad! I just feel like there’s no reason she should be struggling with money and I’m not. She has twice as much help as I do.