Im so sad... I need to know what to do.. Any advice appreciated... So i have a cousin that had a 3.5yr affair w our other cousins BD. She moved in next door to me... Magically my husband started disappearing after i went to sleep or was magically with her when I left... Yall i know something probably happened.

Weve been together 5yrs... Hes a compulsive liar. Lots of trauma issues... Whatever... I told him i wanted to seperate till he could work on himself an i could heal... Im not gonna lay it all out. But its alot. Biggest things he let my brother steal my car to go on a drug run w a 16yr old girl who was on state probation.

He stood up for him an i feel like that was fucked up.

He lied to my face about getting high the day we buried our baby... (She was born still at 18wks) an i got blamed for weed even being there. In front of him an he never said anything.

I was also left up there by the grave alone during the burial. He was up there long enough for him to lay her in a start to put dirt back over her. Then walked off... Sadly... I dont even care if he wanna smoke weed. I dont. but it helps people. I just wanted the truth.

With my cousin ive tried talking to him an it never mattered. Yes we are seperated but hes spent the day saying out things are different an if i just give him one more chance he will show me. Yet i said. If thats the case dont go over there. An then he said he was gonna go outside an poof. Said he was just wanting to be nice an offer dude that was there whos not her bf but her ex who stays there a beer. Then after i confront him an get his drunk ass in bed here's what I find.

This shows it was premeditated right? Am i crazy?

Im not perfect. Ive fucked up. But... The ways ive done it. I hurt myself. My intention wasnt to hurt him... Like to make myself think oh im a bad person. I deserve him...