So sad. Just a rant had to tell someone

So sad and heart broken. We have been trying for 2.5 years or so i thought. Weve got a positive and now he doesnt want it cuz hes to scared and isnt ready for this and that basicly everything bad bout kids. He wont even look at anything thats great about kids. Excuses like im not ready i dont know how to be dad... I cant handle a crying baby what if they keep us up all night we will need a new place to live( we have 3 bedroom with his little brother so not sure if he means he wants to kick lil bro out or if he thinks lil bro will move out) kids are expensive how will we find day care blah blah blah. Wont all those be issues even if we waited longer to have one? He knew this would happen and we talked about using protection if he didnt want kids but when i brought that up he said he havnt talked about that in a long time i didnt know it was something id have to talk about over and over. I want a baby and have for a long time (7yr relationship) and he knows that. I told him if he wasnt ready we can use protection but he didnt so i thought he was ok with it even had said thing like "want to try and make a baby?" I want to beleive he is just scared and will turn around but im scared im just wishing for the impossible. Thanks for listing to my rant.