Why does nobody talk about how alive the world is

Random/strange rant ahead. My mental health has really been improving.

And I just want to type some things out kind of like a diary. I’ve been observing things and noticing positive changes within myself.

I want to know why nobody ever told me how alive the world is when you’re not depressed. I didn’t realize how dead everything seemed to me until I started getting better. I didn’t realize how the sky seems like it’s breathing, or how the grass moves in the wind. I didn’t notice the stars at night. If you lay under them eventually it just feels like you’re sinking into them. I forgot what it was like to just sit outside, and enjoy it. I forgot what it was like to enjoy anything really. I cannot believe just how disconnected I was with myself and with the world and especially with my own body.

I am not feeling so dysphoric and disconnected anymore. When I look into the mirror i recognize myself again. I am seeing myself, feeling like my body and my face matches me again. And oh my god, music. Music makes me feel things again. I am discovering all sorts of new music.

I don’t think I’m 100% there yet. But I think I’m getting there. Definitely having a lot of improvement.

Thank you for reading, if you read this.