I cannot explain to you the hell the last 2 days have been. You see that kittens are overflowing the shelter and you try to help out by fostering some littles and you wonder where they’re gonna end up.

they started sneezing one day.

Then dying.

Antibiotics, antibiotics injections, steroids, nebulizer treatments, forcefeedings, IV fluids, oxygen therapy, cough medicine,

NOTHING WAS ENOUGH TO SAVE THESE BABIES. The vet nearly made me cry because she was trying to emphasize how there was absolutely nothing else we could do. She knew I felt like a failure

Then there’s this kitten. Seemingly unphased. Still eating, still playing. The vet says he’s a boy.

And for his survival, for beating this hell I just watched these little creatures endure even with all the help offered, I’m naming him alpha. He is 3 weeks old. The vet is impressed by him. He was playful and even cuddled an old dog.

Diagnosis: a viral infection that turned bacterial and eventually turned into pneumonia. She says it happens extremely fast because their bodies are not capable of fighting it.

I feel absolutely defeated. I haven’t slept at all because I spent the past 2 days trying to keep them alive and failed. But I still have this guy clinging to me.

And yeah.. I’m probably gonna keep him. This was very emotionally hard for me, and if he really pulls through and thrives he’s just going to have to be mine.