I'm out this month, ladies

AF is due on Sunday. Medically assisted this cycle (metformin since February, letrozole cd 3-7, and then progesterone and baby aspirin after ovulation). It seems I need to go get pads and prep for AF to show her ugly head. After 2 losses, a ton of bloodwork and a hysteroscopy procedure (which is awful, btw), birth control for 3 cycles, and even more meds. My doctor was sure it would happen first cycle off birth control with all of those meds on board. I'm sad that I believed them, but maybe now is not the time due to covid and the protests, and maybe we should not actually try. Previous losses were a surprise after being told i could never get pregnant.

I'm so depressed, y'all. I know that "I'm not out until AF shows" but I know in my gut that I am out this month, just like I knew last 2 pregnancies that I was pregnant before the test was taken and I knew I was losing the babies before I had signs.

I just want my rainbow 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭💔💔💔💔💔💔💔😭😭😭😭😭😭😭