i got cheated on

i have been with the same guy for over 7 years. just yesterday while i was at work i found out he cheated on me with a girl he had told me not to worry about 2 years ago. i had found him texting her and i never knew he was but he said she was his friend which at the time was probably true. it still felt shady but i decided to forget about it.

the girl texted me yesterday telling me that he has been reaching out trying to meet up with her and come to find out they actually dated last year while me and him were taking a break. i found out that they even had sex, and keep in mind i still haven’t fully given it to him because it just hasn’t been the right time so maybe he did it because i just never gave it to him. but i feel that i would feel a lot worse if i had sex with him and then found out he cheated on me. i’m lost i’m broken i don’t know what to do. i love him so so much and i know i am stupid for that but it’s just so fresh for me to even be trying to move on. his mom and i texted and she keeps telling me

to take my space but to not give up on him. he continues to say that he will be better and make it better but respects that i need my space and

time. i want to be okay and i don’t want to be sad and i know i need to heal but is it bad that i still want to be with him. i know that i need to take my space and time but fuck you guys this is so hard. i never thought it would happen to me. is it bad that i still want to be with him and forgive him obviously not now but someday. i really need advice.