My nerves are getting the better of me...

So I'm 6 wks 3 days, first US Monday, at 7 wks. Doctor didn't order blood work or early US, and I decided to wait, rather than complain, because last time I got good 2 day bloodwork at 4 wks, a good US at 5 wks, then a less good US at 7 wks, then questionable bloodwork, then another US, then more bloodwork... and finally, at week 10, confirmation of no baby. So this time, I figured, it didn't do me any good going in early last time, only added to my stress and then still had to wait until week 10 for confirmation, which was torture... plus covid is really bad here, #2 worst city in the world, so I decided to try to just wait until the week 7 US, unless I had issues or got really scared. I did good.

Until now.

There's really no reason for it, I'm just having a good, old-fashioned freak out. My boobs still hurt & I'm still nauseous, both things that had gone away by now last time. But I think as it gets closer, I'm scared to face the music. What if the news is bad? The very thought makes me shake. I have been believing all this time that everything is okay this time, I managed to stay positive... but what if I have been wrong? What if it happened again, and I completely lose my mind? (And I will freak out. Badly. I turn 39 this week. I'm out of time for a first natural baby & can't afford any ivf or even a consult w a fertility dr.)

I just wanted to share my fear. If anyone has anything comforting to say, or thinks they can boost my brain, fire away! Help wanted!