Is it over?

I've been with my SO for about 3.5 years. We've had our ups and downs. We were expecting a child in June of last year, but I lost her at about 35 weeks. We were both devastated. He was drinking off and on beforehand, but it got progressively worse since we lost our daughter. He was in and out of the hospital. His liver was failing at 30 years old. He went from acute alcoholic hepatitis in May 2019 to cirrhosis of the liver in September 2019.

It seemed like things we're starting to get better in late January/early February of this year. He had stopped drinking but he was admitted into the hospital in March for pneumonia and sepsis. He was on a ventilator for 3-ish weeks, where 2 of those weeks he was in a medically induced coma. I took time off of work during the height of the COVID-19 pandemic to take care of him after he was discharged from the hospital. I took him to physical therapy, I paid for what he needed, made sure he took his prescriptions, always made sure to spend time with him and reassuring how much I loved him, etc. I've always stood by him and helped him however I could.

I pressured him to go back to work when I knew he was doing 100% better. He doesn't let me forget that. The only reason was because I financially can't take care of us. I've tried to do it before, but I always came up short.

Everything seemed like it was going in the right direction. I was trying to get a loan for a house so we could move forward. We had even talked about having another baby. Lately things have just been... off. Any time he has off he wants to be gone. I feel rejected. He spends more time at work/fishing either alone or with his friends/going camping with his sister than he does with me. I've talked to him about how I felt and completely broke down. He told me he didn't know what I wanted from him and that the reason I feel the way I feel is because I'm too hard on myself. That I get in my own head, which dies have a little truth in it. I told him I felt like we were strangers sleeping in the same bed.

I don't know what to do. I feel completely broken. I'm angry or depressed all the time. Am I crazy?