Im just so sad/depressed! Please help!

May 21st i lost my baby at 6 weeks due to it being ectopic. They took my tube, I almost died. July 3rd, we found out my mom has stage 4 cancer and tomorrow she has surgery to remove her voice box and some other stuff. Im so scared. I don't wanna lose my mom. My dad was never around so she's all i have. Idk how to handle my emotions anymore. Tomorrow morning will be the last time I ever hear my mom tell me she loves me again. I just want to not feel anything anymore. I want to be numb. I need prayers, positive energy, what ever good thing you can send our way...