Things could have been different

I wish you would have stayed with me the night you told me you kissed her, so we could properly talk, so I could properly analyze you. I wish I didn’t walk in to an empty apartment after I turned around on the highway and drove home because I was in no condition to drive. I wish you would have faced me instead of running off to your parents that night. I wish I wouldn’t have said anything, and gave you the silent treatment the last 3 days we lived together. I wish I could have cherished the last time I slept in bed with you. I wish I could have cherished our last shower/bath. I wish I could have cherished our last kiss the morning of the day you cheated on me. I wish I didn’t blow up on you like I did; I tried so hard to hold back but the pain was too much.

I miss you god dammit, but I know it’s for the best.