Just want to be considered

I’m the only girl in my family. My parents are insanely lackadaisical when it comes to me. They’re reason is that I’m married and I don’t need they’re help. But with my brothers they move mountains.

We lost one of my older brothers in June. I was 21 weeks pregnant when it happened. I’m still having a hard time with it. I haven’t seen a therapist yet because I’m waiting till our baby is here.

Anyways, I’ve needed my family (my parents) around me. But they haven’t been there. They’re reason now is Covid. I haven’t seen them in months and I’ve been battling depression from his death. Like shouldn’t we gather together? It’s no secret I’m having a hard time with this. We had a covid/social distance shower that my stepmom didn’t come to AND tried to sabotage so if wouldn’t happen.

I talked to my Dad about how I’ve been feeling, this morning. His response was “when your stepmom got pregnant with your little brother, it was after Grandma (his mom) passed away. Your stepmom’s parents lived out of state and we had to do it on our own then too. We made a decision together to not put your at risk.” First, they got pregnant AFTER grandma passed. They weren’t pregnant during it. Second, my parents were 36 and 42 when that happened. It wasn’t a sudden death, we knew it was coming.

I know I sound super insensitive and it’s probably the hormones. But I’m hurt.