To much sex?

Question

Alright ladies. I'm going to try and explain this as much as I can but not write a book. So I got divorced 4 years ago. I have a 5 year old daughter. Her dad was abusive, physically and mentally and cheated on me with a man. I won't go into detail but he put my through a lot. Yes it took me a while to leave but I got my daughter out of it and thats what matters. He is still a horrible person who's in and out of jail. Okay so I dated one person shortly after my divorce because I was lonely. Last 3 months and I left because he didn't like my daughter. I took a few years to heal, love myself, but I still struggle with anxiety and PTSD from my marriage. So I am now with an amazing man. I love him so much and I've never been this close to someone before. He treats me and my daughter amazing. He claims her as his own. So about 4 months ago I got off the implanon so we could try for a baby. Still no luck after 4 months of TTC. But anyways, we got into a "fight" last weekend because he said that all I wanted was sex and we have sex to much? I explained to him I just wanted to make sure we had sex around my fertile window. He said he misses when we would just cuddle and kiss and it wouldn't always lead to sex. He says he loves having sex with me but he isn't with me just for sex. But I got my feelings hurt, probably because of my anxiety. He said he could go months without having sex with me and still love me. Is that normal? Is there such thing as to much sex? It was like 5 days a week. Am I getting to butthurt? Someone tell me its all in my head or am I right for being upset?

Answer

I do understand his side of it, TTC gets stressful and eventually feels like having sex is work and not fun and special anymore. 
When ttc our first we tried for a year, and we got to the point we didnt care about catching the fertile window, we just have sex when we felt like it. 
I would just talk to him in a calm sense and explain how you’re not meaning to make it 
sex sex sex all the time. 
Might be good to take a little break to make things special again 🤷🏼‍♀️
I don’t think you’re overthinking things, just got your feelings hurt, but from this side of the phone it doesn’t sound like he’s trying to be mean or whatever. He’s probably just tired of 
“Just having sex”. 🙂 Hope everything goes ok

Answer

I’m not even trying to conceive and my bf sometimes just wants to cuddle. Some men just really do not want to have sex so often. Maybe his sex drive isn’t high. Let him crave you. I realize sex is so much better for me when my bf is really into it and misses doing it. TTC can be extremely stressful on both people. That’s why most doctors recommend at least 3 times around the fertile window. You do not need to have sex everyday. It is redundant. Sperm can survive up to 5 days inside.

Answer

If you're TTC. I think he may feel like there's too much sex because it's more of a chore than a connection. If the sex is always spontaneous, theres no such thing as too much! Maybe try to approach getting pregnant with the mentality of "not not trying" if that makes sense?? My husband and i did that with both our kids. Let the sex come naturally and we got pregnant with our first in less than 3 months and less than a month with our second! Plus this method also helped us really enjoy the process and not put pressure on us!

Answer

I understand where you are coming from because of ttc, but I also can relate to him. My husband can never snuggle me or kiss me without humping me or trying to have sex. Sometimes I just want some affection that has nothing to do with sex. It makes me feel like an object and makes me feel bad about myself. That being said, we did have a lot of sex when TTC. My best advice is to use OPKs so that you know exactly when you are ovulating. That way you don’t overdo it/ turn him off of the whole ttc thing. It is stressful, but I would be upset if I was him too.

Answer

I think when you’re TTC, the focus becomes less on being intimate with your romantic partner and more of the goal of becoming pregnant. It becomes a mission and the love can fall out of the equation. 
To that I say, compromise. Learn to read each other’s body language. If you don’t TTC one month, that’s okay, there’s always the next. If you’re cuddling and kissing in bed, let him lead. If he wants to have sex, he’ll let you know. 
I think you both need to have a sit down discussion, explaining both of your opinions and goals, and working out how best to maintain a sexual relationship as well as TTC. I know people say this all the time, but people are more likely to conceive when they stop overplanning and overstressing about ovulation dates! 
Maybe when you know you’re ovulating, you can make the night romantic. Cook a meal together, have a couple of glasses of wine. Wear some sexy lingerie that makes you feel confident. Give each other massages. Light some candles. Do anything that makes both of you feel special! After all, the outcome will be the same, but you will both be paying special attention to each other, connecting not just physically, but emotionally too. 
Good luck 💕!!

Answer

Four months is not long to be trying at all and if you're already asking for too much sex you're going to end up causing issues in your relationship. Take it easy, it's not a race.

Answer

We got married 5 yrs before.. We had sex 4 times weekly at first.. Aftr getting pregnant ones in week.. Aftr delivery also ones in week.. Aftr 1yr of delivery it was like ones in 2 weeks.. He loves to hug and sleep with me more now.. Now i think ones in a mnth.. We are planning for a baby next yr.. Hopes it works... Evryone changes.. So dt worry... Lyf is full of adjztmts....

To much sex?

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