Vent post: pregnancy moods and feeling alone

Florence

I’m not really a poster but I just feel like I have no other space to vent. It seems like me and my partner are going at it EVERYDAY. I feel like I’m literally sick allll day, and very tired, I have this taste in my mouth that barely goes away and I’m just not in the lightest of moods. I’m usually pretty upbeat but these days it very hard to be to feel any kind of way besides sick and tired.

I feel like he takes it personal, if he calls and I don’t seem upbeat or happy he gets frustrated and ends up saying something hurtful or mean about me being in such a down state which then in turn it gets me pissed and I no longer want to speak to him. I love him but i feel like he’s not even TRYING to understand that I’m all out of sorts and I may be a lot more sensitive than usual.

This afternoon, he jokes about hopefully I have twins, I said I well on the bright side I wont have to go through pregnancy again. He says “yeah because I dont think I can do this again” so now I’m just like well what do you mean? You’re not the one who’s going through all these symptoms. He responds with saying how moody I’ve been. I literally CRIED. That was so hurtful to me, so he means to tell me that I’M the reason he doesn’t want anymore kids? Thats soo messed up!! I’m still really hurt about it even though we made up hours ago, I just don’t think that’s a statement I’m ever going to forget.

Then as we continue to argue he says that he feels like I’m purposely acting this way because I think thats how I’m supposed to be acting. What the heck?!! Are you flippin kidding? Because I want to be nauseous tired and moody all day. I’m the same person who showed this man nothing but love even when he was going through a lot emotionally. Why would i DELIBERATELY want to be mean to him??

I feel as though he is not even attempting to empathize with me and I’m extremely hurt that he would ever assume those things about me. Now I just feel.... SO ALONE 🥺