I’m honestly so stupid 😞💔😢

About a year ago a started talking to this fine ass, 19 year old, military man. I had just turned 23 and wasn’t so sure about a younger guy. After we talked for a little over a month I realized I was hella into him. We decided on New Years eve to meet in person and hang out and have some fun for the night. I told him that I’m not one to sleep with a guy on the first date and he said that was fine. We got together and hung out for a while and one thing led to another and we ended up having sex several times during the day. He just did everything right. He was so handsome and sweet and sexy and had me soooooo turned on. Ladies, let me tell you, dick was BOMB AF!!!!! He was the best sex I had ever had!! I was beyond into this guy! Shortly after fucking a few times he said he had to go because he wanted to see his friends before going back to base the next state over. He said he would call me and we’d arrange to hang out again soon. He did message me a few more times after that and then just disappeared. Deleted me off of everything. I knew I was sooooo stupid. No one that got would ever be into me for anything more than getting his dick wet. I was hurt, but moved on with my life. Well, last night he randomly added me on Snapchat again. I simply wanted to see what he had to say so I added him back. He started apologizing, saying he’d fucked up and still liked me and couldn’t stop thinking about me. I knew it was bullshit from the start. He said he wanted to be my boyfriend, but keep it kinda low key. I knew we just wanted his dick wet again. I asked him what his idea of low key is and he says “we fuck whenever I’m in town, and send each other sexy shit, you can be my dirty little slut”. Ladies, I feel so many emotions about it. I stopped answering him. He keeps trying to get me to send him nudes, but I just keep ignoring him. I feel used, I feel gross, I feel stupid, I feel worthless. I thought for once I fine ass man was interested in me, but I’m just easy pussy to him.