Potty training struggle for almost 4 year old 😩

My daughter will be 4 in December and getting her to use the potty for pee and poop is STILL a battle. Poops are definitely the worst- she will hold it for days. But even just getting her to pee is a struggle. I feel like she should be over this by now. We just her choices (big potty, little potty, upstairs, downstairs), we help her, we help her wipe, and wash her hands so she doesn’t have any fear of being abandoned or anything. But I feel like she should be able to do this pretty much on her own with no fuss but it’s a meltdown every time 😩 any advice or insight?