Having a hard time

I just finished my second week back at work and I’m just so sad ... my job is so stressful with Covid regulations and the ever changing policies and procedures. I come home and I feel like I get 5min with her before I have to sit and pump for 20min and it always ends up that I pump while my husband feeds her (we exclusively pump. I wish we could nurse but she never latched well) then she falls asleep. I typically do the next feed and then sometimes she will be awake but a lot of times she sleeps again. And then by the time her next feed comes around I am dead tired and need to sleep for work the next day. Then in the morning she is still sleeping usually when I leave so again I don’t get to spend time with her. She’s home with my husband all day bc he is still on partial leave and working 2 days a week from home (which I love bc she isn’t in a daycare) and I’m starting to feel like she prefers him. I don’t think he means to but he has been telling me how to do things like I’m not her mother and it’s bothers me so much. I know he has gotten her used to certain things but it makes me feel so out of the loop and useless. Also bc im so stressed and tired and sad all the time I keep snapping at my husband. I can’t control it.. it’s like everything he does makes me mad. I kinda resent him lately. I really want to be a stay at home mom, and we can definitely afford it but my husband pushed me to go back at least to try it and he keeps telling me I have to give it longer. I don’t want to give it longer... I don’t want my child to have a mother who is constantly stressed out and always snapping at everyone. I also don’t want her to not want me to feed or hold her.

I really just needed to vent...

Thanks for reading