I’m so alone

I have no friends in a toxic relationship with no way to get out nobody to vent to I’ve always had depression but it’s been so much worse lately I hat my self I hate life I can’t find the motivation to get my self together to change the situation I have no where to go and neither does he it’s my house but he has mail here and the gas bill so I can’t just kick him out. All we do is argue we’re not happy just together cause of what we’ve been thru and cause there’s no other options sorry just needed to vent I have no one

Update. I doubt anyone cares but I finally got him out and it’s been amazing!