This will sound terrible.

I’m the first of my close friends to have two kids. We all have 2 year olds, but I also have a newborn.

It’s been a hard transition. They know that, and they have tried to be supportive.

Sometimes i feel envious when they say how easy their kids are or say how they’re doing so much. For example: one friend said she has been having the best spring ever. That all she does is play all day with her toddler outside and do fun things. She also planted a garden and completed house projects. Another example: my other friend was saying how she was going to have a night to just pamper herself and she was looking forward to it sooo much.

I want my friends to be happy. I’m not a mean person. But part of me wishes they didn’t have it SO easy. One of them just transitioned to a toddler bed and her kid just sleeps perfectly. No struggle. Like, come on!

They make me feel bad about being tired due to currently bedsharing. They both sleep trained at 12 weeks. I am pro-sleep training, but 12 weeks is too early for me to feel comfortable with it.

I don’t get a second to myself. Ever. I take 5 minute showers. I take the kids with me everywhere. My husband always works.

I know I should focus on the fun and positive parts of having two kids. But it’s hard, when I feel like the grass is currently greener on the other side. I know it’s all temporary. I know I will live the age gap between my kids one day. But right now it’s just hard. One kid was so much easier. 🤦‍♀️