Emotional Incest? (Read Description)

Question

Okay so I'm married but ever since my husband and I started dating, my MIL has had an issue with me. I wish I could have a nice normal relationship with her but it's impossible... she's even tried to attack me while she was drunk one time (I was completely sober). So yeah. We have a neutral relationship at the moment but we don't get along like I would like. Anyway. Something between her sons and her has been bugging me for the past couple years and I think it's just weird. So she got out of a long term relationship a couple years ago and started dating again... well guess who she spills all of her dating details to? Her sons (both in their 30s). She talks to them like she's talking to her best friend about getting railed. EVERY SINGLE TIME they talk too, she'll talk about each person she's dating or dated since they last talked and if they were good or bad in bed, how the date went, ect. She also askes them both for relationship and life advice often. She literally needs them for emotional support for every single thing she does. I feel it's not a healthy mother/son relationship for them. I would be mortified if my mother started talking about bedroom details to me, and we're pretty comfortable. To them they were kind of like "why is she talking to me about this" when it first started now they're just used to it and don't question it. So I'm just looking for outsiders input. Would this type of situation be considered emotional Incest? They are her only children.

Accepted Answer

They’re ADULTS. This isn’t emotional
Incest. She’s talking to them like adult children, who have become friends. If they don’t care to hear about sex they can say that. It’s not inappropriate to share dating information with your adult children.

Answer

No, this is not incestuous in any way. It is very much creepy but it seems to me that she is just that comfortable with her adult sons, especially if she doesn't have any friends or anyone else that she feels she can talk to. Has either son told her that they are uncomfortable with it or that she is being way too creepy and over sharing? If they haven't the she probably thinks they are okay with it. If they aren't and they haven't told her that then they really need to.

Answer

Not incest but creepy af 🤢🤮
I would have a huge issue with this if it was me.  Id tell him to hang up everytime.

Answer

Its inappropriate but it isnt incest!

Answer

No, emotional incest is when you treat your child like your partner. Example adult child living at home and they act like a couple-cooking dinner, watching tv, and as far as sleeping in the same bed. That’s not what she’s doing.  
I personally think it’s weird too, but I have friends that their parents and them talk about their love lives and details. Every dynamic is different. Have they shut her down or say it makes them uncomfortable? I’m guessing no, this is just how mom is to them, right?

Answer

It’s weird and uncomfortable, but not emotional incest. They need to set boundaries if they don’t like it. I get that you think they can’t, but they can, and just need to stick to them. If she can’t respect those boundaries, they need to stop the relationship.

Answer

I think it’s very uncomfy considering on how she talks very graphic maybe even at all because it is their mom lmao but I talk to my mom about sex but not in this way

Answer

I mean what’s weird is being as detailed as being “railed” . I’ve talked to my friends about pregnancy scares but I wouldn’t make it graphic . I would cut to the chase as quick as possible . 
Now my sense of humor is dirty minded and I also share that side with my friends but she sounds like she is not kidding

Answer

Girl I thought you were just being nuts and making things up so I Googled it and found out it’s a real thing! Shocker to me 😳.

This sounds exactly like what you’re describing.  Learn something new everyday.

Answer

My MIL sometimes gives my husband and I TMI when talking about her dating life. My husband just says “ew mom I don’t want to hear that stuff”… she’s just treating us like adults, which we are, and friends, which we are. I don’t think it’s totally inappropriate as long as she respects us when we say it’s not something we want to discuss lol she doesn’t have a lot of close female adult friends, so we are just some of the only people she can talk to

Emotional Incest? (Read Description)

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