Establishing Boundries

Looking for advice how to delicately establish boundaries without being rude or coming off ungrateful.

Backstory: we recently sold our house and moved into my parents cottage. They live 5 min down the street. This is an amazing opportunity for us to save $$ and we made money. My mom also watches our 20-month old son Mon and Wed.

This issue… Tuesday, Thursday and Friday my mom is always here. We are on the beach, so beach days we get it. We agreed Saturdays and Sunday’s during the summer were free game for my parents to be here for the beach and could sleep over Saturday nights which they have only once because neighbors were hanging out and everyone was drinking.

But yesterday it was 65 and I had the house professionally cleaned. My husband got home at 3 and had been sending me sext (I work remote and was totally down). As he pulls in so does my mom, because she wanted to see how the cleaners did 🙄

My husband is also working on his sobriety, and he’s doing well but needs time to unwind after work and that’s his me-time before he gets our son at daycare. My parents know this. They support us and him, it’s been a long battle. Sometimes when he gets home (before moving) we barely talk then and that’s okay. He never gets that time here, my mom is always here. I feel so bad for him, he’s an introvert by nature too. He needs this time. He likes her, she’s a genuine kind and helpful person. But we need our privacy sometimes.

What do we do?! We feel like assholes since she is helping us with letting us stay here rent free and providing childcare twice a week. But this has been tough. Ugh.

** this is two separate houses. My parents have their own house separate from this one down the street)