How do u think about depression after birth?

Question

Depression after birth is real. I suffered before, but luckily I managed to pull through on my own. My MIL said, last time she even had harder life than I am now, why didn’t see she suffer from depression? From her point of view, women nowadays have a better life but still have depression, she doesn’t even understand. What do you think about her statements? Heard what she said, really make my depression come back. Amen.

Answer

First of all, I beg to differ with her theory. The state of the world in 2021 regarding economy, corona, financial and social pressures, technology being a curse just as much as a blessing, and 'perfection as standard' is VERY different than in the 80s and early 90s. In the 80s, my mom leaving us unsupervised to play outside, owning just 5 outfits and a scrunchie and 1 ugly sweatshirt, and ordering pizza hut for dinner, driving your kids in a beat up old car carseats and seatbelts optional, and 10 stations available on tv was standard. My neighbors were a SAHM and dad a high school diploma truck driver and they could well afford to own a spacious house for $50K in a very nice neighborhood on just his income. We have a lot more challenges today. A lot.
Secondly, depression isnt about having it easy. It's mostly due to biology and hormones. Maybe she doesnt have a genetic predisposition for depression, lucky her. Secondly, our generation very much has a "not good enough" negative self talk with the appearance of perfectionism from social media. Too much information of how to do everything "right" and we cant live up to that standard. That negative self talk doesnt help, we often feel inadequate.

Answer

I think her comments were really ignorant. It seems to me like that generation is very uneducated in mental health and have a “tough it out” mentality. There’s so much more pressure on women today to do it all-excel in our careers, cook healthy meals for our families, be super mom, super wife, maintain a beautiful home and stay fit. I think these things can definitely impact mental health. Everyone has different mental and emotional capacities. And depression and anxiety isn’t always caused by external factors. It’s literally a chemical imbalance in the brain.

Answer

PPD has a huge hormonal component so having and “easier life” doesn’t really make much of a difference. My MIL is the same though. After my son I was having weekly virtual therapy because I knew almost immediately that I had it, plus I was already seeing a therapist for years before I had my son. There are just simply people who don’t understand mental illness and it’s sad.

Answer

My mom said the same. My pregnancy and pp was rough endless symptoms, depression and anxiety (my first child) But my my mom had 4 and she said she didn’t get anything besides minor nausea. So idk if is because of the meds back then or immune system or vaccines or something because I agree. How did women back then manage to have 4, 8, 12, 14 kids and were fine

Answer

Diathesis Stress Model
Basically it explains how different life events affect other people. It counts into different factors like genetic predisposition for mental health diagnoses, support systems, financial situations, environmental stressors,  coping skills, etc 
So for example. My mother had bad postpartum with my sister (but not necessary me) because my sister was premature and needed 2 months of intense nicu time. So knowing that i knew i had the predisposition for it and i suffered with depression in college. Naturally i had pretty severe postpartum after my first. My second born was a traumatic birth so instead of having PPD as bad as i did, i had birth induced PTSD.

Answer

Agree with all of u here. Old generations normally don’t understand about those mental illnesses. When I know someone had it, they just give some comment such as “So weak mental health, just like that already broke down”. In this kind of situation, women suffered from depression really need family and husband to help them to pull through.

How do u think about depression after birth?

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