cant orgasm and i feel broken

ever since i was about 9/10 i started masturbating. i masturbate by humping pillows (weird i know) and i orgasm every time. well i’ve been sexually active for almost a full year, and i can never orgasm with my boyfriend. i’m always faking it. fingering feels good but not enough. my bf tries to rub my clit and it’s so sensitive it genuinely hurts. i also don’t like receiving oral. i don’t mind having orgasmless sex but it would be nice to experience full pleasure and not have to fake it. i already have body image issues (small boobs, longer labia) and this just makes me hate my body more. i feel genuinely broken and frustrated.